Historical Barbies: Warning Shallow Post! May 29, 2014
Author: Beach Combing | in : Actualite, Ancient, Contemporary, Medieval, Modern, Prehistoric , trackbackBarbie is an American doll that has been marketed across the globe since 1959 and that was based on an earlier German ‘sexy’ doll Bild Lilli (another post, another day). Barbie was, of course, an instant success and continues to outsell all rivals – there is a Barbie doll purchased every three seconds somewhere in the world – and part of the key to her success has been the endless wardrobes that children (or infantilised adults) can change to their heart’s content. Themed Barbies are a regular occurence: Star Wars Barbies, James Bond Barbies, Moby Dick Barbies (ok I made that last one up…) This much is shared and very general knowledge. What is not so well known is that several historical Barbie dolls were issued, and also that Barbie enthusiasts (an interesting breed) adapted official models to explore some of the backwaters of antiquity, the middle ages and modernity: who needs a doctorate when you can put chains on a Roman slave Barbie? StrangeHistory has brought together here some of the best historical Barbies from an hour long google image search. There is something absolutely magical about Barbie’s vapid smile above the rich evocative dress of a mothballed era. Let’s start with my favourite at the head of this post: Barbie as Lucrezia Borgia, a ruthless, sensual, intelligent Renaissance woman, who would have spent afternoons planning new and exciting ways to kill anyone who dared play with her.
Next we have an ancient Greek Barbie, actually ‘the Goddess of Wisdom’ model; it is wonderful how Barbie’s makers constantly tried to valorise Barbie’s intellect. I see Venus not Athena though in those lips…
Next comes Third Reich Barbie (well actually it is Bavarian Barbie). Connosieurs will be interested to know that there is also a neo-nazi barbie: Beach has even run into an illustrated page including the memorable line ‘I don’t endorse Nazis, nor do I endorse Barbies‘.
Staying with the Aryans here is Viking Barbie.
This is the only shot I’ve found of prehistoric Barbie: did she hunt or gather and more importantly did she take part in the secondary products revolution?
This is Leonardo Barbie: note Mona Lisa’s enigmatic smile (ahem).
Victorian Barbie (with Cedric the bear) looking like an extra in a bad production of Peter Pan.
Pirate Barbie, though I fear that this is taken from a movie franchise.
Cleopatra Barbie, one of the most valuable of all the Barbies… Was Ken her brother? Yuk!
Medieval Barbie: the fourth estate with inadequate child-bearing hips and a very silly hairstyle.
Celtic Barbie or ‘Bard Barbie’ as she was called on the box: presumably getting ready to bring Ken to the wicker man.
Then, on the subject of Ken, here is an Arthur (!!!!) and Guinevere set.
A very witty remake of Henry VIII and his unlucky wives: detachable heads anyone?
And for modern times woman priest Barbie: in commemoration of those brave and generally unBarbie looking women in the Anglican/Episcopalian church in the 1990s.
Cowboy Barbie, wrestling steers to the ground.
Though not strictly historical, I also like couch potato Barbie and DUI Barbie.
Other ancient, medieval or modern Barbies: drbeachcombing AT yahoo DOT com
I’ve left non-white Barbies out of this, mainly because the ethnic versions look too convincing and spoil the dreadful effect of Barbie playing at history: in other words they make for credible tableaux. Oh and here is my top twelve I-wish historical Barbies should anyone have the time and resources
1) Commissar Barbie (USSR under Stalin)
2) Kibbutz Barbie (c. 1920)
3) Shaman Barbie (Arctic Circle 400 BC)
4) Bearded Woman Barbie (Victorian Freak Show)
5) Barbarian Barbie (fifth century, rancid butter in hair)
6) Late Antique Barbie (Christian, virgin, occasional miracles)
7) 1968 Protest Barbie
8) Byzantine Barbie
9) Loose Barbie (Whitechapel prostitute, 1880s)
10) Vangarian Guard Barbie
11) Tea Party Barbie (US c. 2012)
12) Witch Suspect Barbie (East Anglia. c. 1600: Ken as witch-hunter general?)
14 Mar 2014: Southern Man writes in with Burka Barbie. Loved the image and here is the Snopes link.
30 April 2014: TB writs in.